Celebrity Boxing: Featuring Craig Cornett

Does anyone remember Craig Cornett? Yeah, I didn’t either.  So I did what any self respecting journalist in blogcasting would do and I went to my local grocer to ask the slightly slow daytime bagger.  Now I know what you are thinking, how the f*ck would Carl know?  But he knew, oh did he know.  Carl quickly informed me the Cornett was a local radio personality that dropped off the map a couple of years ago.  He let me in on the fact that Cornett was on 93.7 the Bull, where they play both kinds of music; Country and Western.   Carl also told me that Cornett was recently arrested for beating the crap out of his 75 year old neighbor Mr. Weatherby.

Authorities said Cornett, 45, of O’Fallon, Mo., admitted to assaulting a 75-year-old man who, a St. Charles County deputy said, “was unable to defend himself due to his age and frailty” in the parking lot of the Ameristar Casino on Dec. 30, 2010.

In a court document, authorities said Cornett struck the man in the head and face repeatedly with his fist “causing the victim to fall back into a vehicle door. Cornett continually struck the victim when no resistance or aggression was presented. The victim sustained numerous lacerations, contusions and swelling about his head and face.”

So much for being the next host on “Harrah’s Lucky Break,” huh Craig?  The real tragedy is that the Casino doesn’t have video of the beat down for all of us to see.  I don’t know about you but behind train wrecks, midget wrestling and clown porn, there is only 1 other guilty pleasure in my arsenal; beating the snot out of the decrepit.

20321_1_160Apparently Cornett is out on bond and is going to be charged with third-degree assault.  He could face up to one year in federal pound me in the @ss prison.  One word of warning for Craig; don’t drop the soap, start a food fight, and be sure to choose your b*tch before he chooses you.  Can I get a Yeehaw?